Author: The Lumine News

Loving One Another Indeed…

“In my 65 years of living in this world, I have never seen anyone who was loved because of their money, because of their position or title in any corporation or in politics, or because of their skill. Nobody loves you for that. People may respect you, people may enjoy according to what they get out of it. And most of the time, people are envious. But when we are compassionate, when we have values, when we have learned how to love others, people love us.” -His Holiness, Radhanath Swami.

I cannot agree less with Guru Swami because, when you have money, and I am not necessarily referring to multi-millions only; when you can meet your needs and are still generous with the spare, many people around you will love you. But when people love you because you have money, when that money is not available again, they will stop loving you. Even if the money is available and you cease to dispense it or that favor they get from you, notice that they will stop greeting or visiting you. They may not turn around to hate you. But they will move on to ‘love’ the next person that has money.

Fame: Many famous people have lapsed into depression, inordinate desires and substance abuse when new stars take their shine as they thin out of the limelight. As the love of fans shift to emerging stars, the exiting stars realize it was the klieg lights that made the stars and it was what was loved, not the stars.

Position: There is no position that anyone can hold sway forever. Not even a monarchy. That too is only for a lifetime, at most. Many who have left positions of influence are replete with experiences of how even their phones are no longer ringing after they exited their influential offices. The love you currently enjoy in that office is appropriated to the title you carry. It is essentially not for you.

Skill: Regardless of the acclaimed love of your fans for your skill, none will bet on you when you are gone past your prime. Whether you are a talented and skillful footballer, athlete, writer, or artist, people will always lay claims to loving you when your skill is still sending love to their homes and helping to win their bets. They will continue to cherish your exploits till the opposite happens. Once that occurs, their acclaimed love for you will move to the current skillful person, even as they continue to remember your exploits with nostalgia.

So until we translate from the norm to deploying these leverages, namely; money, fame, position, skill, in the pursuit of empathy and compassion towards one another and the world, genuine love will remain elusive. It is the primary reason why those who possess money, fame, position and talent, always resort to charitable causes. But empathy and compassion cannot be bought. They must emanate from a genuine state of mind. A compulsive desire to empathize with humanity.

As species, we have survived by being judgmental and suspicious of and preying on other species. We have weaponized money, fame, position and talent as some form of subtle controls. But we must develop the mental capacity to step past this most primal urge to attain love. It is by shutting down that animal instinct and forcing our brain to tow a different pathway, the pathway of kindness and compassion, that we can engender genuine love in return.

Yours sincerely,
Citizen Agba Jalingo.

If you have something, this is the best time to share it. Just anything that you can spare. At the same time, if you do not have, do not over stretch your means. Things are really really difficult for the person next door and those far off. There is no free meal even in grandma’s house any longer. If you are not aware already, you either live in isolation or you haven’t been checking on your neighbors.

From family members and relations to friends, to coworkers, to co-worshippers, to neighbors, to acquaintances to even random strangers, more and more persons are resorting to seeking financial augmentation from someone else who they think things are better with. But the reality is truly that not many people are exempted from the prevailing crunch, including those we are calling for help.

The middle place here is to endeavor to provide a shoulder for someone this period not minding some inconvenience.

If you have a means, avail someone.

If you have some money, share with someone.

If you have food, share with someone.

If you have an opportunity, call someone up.

If you have an idea that can earn, share it with someone or pursue it with someone.

If you have left overs or things you aren’t using, give them out. Someone somewhere needs them.

If you have love, spread it. That’s what we need most now.

If you have hope, give as many as are hopeless.

If you have advice, give those who ask for it.

If you have a word of prayer, pray for the needy.

And for the needy, do not always think that others have to give. If you fail to get, do not always conclude that you were denied because the person is wicked. It is not true, most of the time. Things are not always the way you assume they are with others. They may not tell you but their hesitation should explain it.

But generally speaking, it must be emphasized that giving to others has been proven to make the giver feel good. It improves our self-esteem and promotes changes in the brain that are linked with happiness. It creates a sense of belonging and reduces isolation and ultimately, it helps to make our world a happier place. So if you have anything, reach out this Sunday morning and give it out to someone to appreciate our humanity. If you don’t have anything, pray that God will enable you so you too will become a giver. Remember, the hand that gives is on top!

Yours sincerely,
Citizen Agba Jalingo.

Ibn Sina, also known as “Avicenna”, is the best known persian and Islamic scholar in Medicine. His medical treatise, the ‘Canon’ was said to be the standard textbook on Medicine in the Arab world and Europe in the 17th century. He was a philosopher, physician, psychiatrist and poet.

The famous scholar once conducted a medical experiment. Avicenna put two identical lambs, both in weight and health, in two separate cages, and placed a wolf in a third. The wolf could only be seen by the lamb in the second cage and the other was placed out of sight.

Both lambs were kept under the same conditions and fed the same meals. But months later, the lamb that could see the wolf died out of sheer stress and fear, though the wolf did not physically go near or pose any threat to the lamb. The other lamb that had not seen the wolf lived on healthily and even added weight.

While one of the lambs was perceiving her condition through the cage and the care giver, the other was seeing her fears, the wolf, next to her, about to take her life. The constant visualization of the wolf which is an imminent threat to her life, diminished the quality of life of the second lamb and consequently took it.

How are you perceiving the numerous constraints and challenges you are facing right now? As a wolf waiting to devour you or through the view of your loving care giver? With the exception of politicians, almost everyone in the country is living in constant fear and internal unrest. Unrest about where the next meal or bill will come from. That is the prevailing trauma as the social media exacerbates it with fearporn and gaslighting.

You have to accept that there is actually no day, no matter how bad it promises to turn out, that will not come and go. The wolf in the next cage isn’t going to kill you. It only depends on how you view it. If a paraphilic mind views a naked body from a balcony, the physical sexual organs are immediately aroused but an artist will view same and see a perfect image that expresses the sensuality of nature. If you bump into someone you are holding malice with, there is a sudden surge of adrenaline into your blood streams that lasts until that person is out of sight, but a self-effacing person will use the opportunity for amends and protect his or her nervous system from adrenalin poisoning.

Many times, as we coddiwomple through the web of life, the challenges are the same for most of us, the difference is how we react to them individually. While some of us see wolves about to devour us, others see calm in the midst of the storm. The country is indeed very tough at the moment for most people. But we have to be tougher. The concept of mind over body is that through the power of the mind and its thoughts, whether through specific exercises or our everyday thoughts, we can make our body do things that we would otherwise view as incredibly difficult or impossible. We can defy limits imposed by our bodies. Like the two experimental lambs of Avicenna, what we decide to see in our tough moments, will eventually determine our fate. Stay strong!

Yours sincerely,
Citizen Agba Jalingo.