My dear brothers and sisters in Christ,
This message is not simply about the ten virgins. It is about something deeper and more mysterious: THE MYSTERY OF EXTRA.
In today’s Gospel reading, Jesus says: “The kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom.”
The Church draws our attention to this parable, and when we listen to it, we may be tempted to think that it is simply a story about ten women. Five were wise, and five were foolish. That is how Scripture describes them. I pray that none of us will be counted among the foolish.
Let us understand something: the distinction between the wise and foolish virgins was not simply about holiness. All ten were waiting for the bridegroom. All ten had lamps. All ten became tired and fell asleep when the bridegroom was delayed. There are moments in life when human strength naturally fails. When you keep vigil for a long time, you will eventually become weak and sleepy.
I remember our school days when, in order to stay awake while studying, we would fetch water and put our feet inside it to prevent ourselves from falling asleep.
The point is that human beings have limitations. There is only so much we can do with our natural strength. However, what distinguished the five wise virgins from the five foolish ones was that the wise virgins carried extra oil. That brings us to the mystery of extra.
Extra means going beyond the ordinary. It means going beyond the minimum requirement. It is that additional effort, strength and preparation that enables you to achieve what others may not be able to achieve.
Consider students who are choosing their careers. You will hear many of them say they want to study Medicine and Surgery because they have heard people talk about it. Others want to study Law, Nursing, Engineering and other prestigious courses. But those who eventually study Medicine and Surgery must be prepared to put in extra effort. They must have the discipline and strength to stay awake, study hard and make sacrifices to succeed.
You cannot achieve extraordinary results with an ordinary commitment. There are certain destinations in life that require extra effort. You must be ready to do more than the minimum if you want to get there.
Extra also means having additional capacity. It is that strength you receive to endure when your natural strength is no longer enough. It is the grace to continue when everything around you seems to be saying, “Give up.”
There are people who enter marriage expecting everything to be easy. At the slightest disagreement or misunderstanding, they call their mothers and say, “Mummy, I cannot take it anymore.” But marriage requires extra grace.
As a married man, you must understand that no matter what challenges come your way, you must not be quick to run away. You need the patience, understanding and commitment to work through difficult moments. Extra means having the ability to say, “I am ready to make progress, even if it is small.”
Some people are always in a hurry to jump to the next level without allowing themselves to grow into it. They want to arrive at a destination for which they have not yet developed the capacity. When you attempt to jump beyond your level of preparation, you may crash-land. Learn to grow. Learn to wait. Learn to build capacity. Extra is the ability to persevere and keep pushing until you reach your destination.
Extra also means the ability to calculate, plan and prepare carefully. The five wise virgins understood that the bridegroom might not arrive at the time they expected. They therefore made provision for a possible delay. They did not simply prepare for what they expected; they prepared for what could happen.
This is an important lesson for all of us. In life, you must not only prepare for the best-case scenario. You must also make room for unexpected situations. In your business, prepare beyond what you need today. In your marriage, cultivate patience and understanding before challenges arise. In your workplace, develop additional skills and capacity. In your spiritual life, do not wait until temptation comes before you begin to build your relationship with God. Preparation is not a sign of fear. It is a sign of wisdom.
The Gospel tells us that at midnight, a cry was heard: “Behold, the bridegroom! Come out to meet him.” At that moment, the foolish virgins discovered that their oil was insufficient. They turned to the wise virgins and requested some of their oil. But the wise virgins could not give them what they needed.
This teaches us a very important spiritual lesson: there are certain things in life that you cannot borrow. You cannot borrow somebody else’s relationship with God. You cannot borrow another person’s faith. You cannot borrow another person’s spiritual preparation. You cannot borrow somebody else’s personal commitment to God. Coming to church does not automatically make you a Christian. You can be physically present in church and still be spiritually far away from God.
Your relationship with God must be personal. You must develop your own prayer life. You must build your own faith. You must cultivate a personal relationship with Christ. The extra oil represents that additional preparation and spiritual readiness that enables you to keep going until the end. I pray for you: May your grace be sufficient to carry you to the end.
Another important lesson in this Gospel is that the bridegroom was delayed. The five wise virgins had to wait longer than they probably expected. Yet they had made adequate preparation.
There are moments in life when the things we expect do not happen as quickly as we desire. You pray, but the answer seems delayed. You work hard, but the breakthrough does not come. You desire marriage, but the right opportunity has not arrived. You desire progress in your business, but things appear to be moving slowly. Sometimes, you may even find yourself asking God, “Why me? Why is this happening to me?”
My dear brothers and sisters, be calm. Do not lose hope. Keep your faith alive. A delay does not mean that God has abandoned you. You need extra grace to remain faithful while waiting. You need extra strength to keep believing when circumstances are not favourable. Do not allow the delay to destroy your faith.
Keep your lamp burning. Keep your hope alive.
As Christians, we are people of the Resurrection. Our hope is not limited to the things we experience in this earthly life. We believe in eternal life and in the promise that we shall be reunited with our loved ones who have gone before us in faith.
St. Paul reminds us that those who have died in Christ have not been forgotten. Our Christian hope is that, at the coming of the Lord, we shall be united with Him and with those who belong to Him. This is why our preparation must go beyond earthly achievements. We must remember that our ultimate destination is eternity.
Whatever you achieve in this world, no matter how successful you become, never forget that life is a journey towards eternity. The question is not simply how much you have achieved, but whether you are prepared to meet the Lord.
The extra oil is also an advantage in our everyday relationships. For instance, in marriage and family life, you need extra grace to accommodate people, understand their weaknesses and maintain peace. You need extra grace to withstand the challenges that may come from your mother-in-law.
You do not need to pray for your mother-in-law to die because one day, you too may become a mother-in-law. What you need is extra grace! Instead of responding to hostility with hostility, respond with love. Keep showing kindness. Let your love and good character become so overwhelming that, eventually, even the most difficult person may find it difficult not to embrace you. In other words, pepper your mother-in-law with love until she does not know what else to do!
That is the mystery of extra: having the grace to respond differently when ordinary human nature would want to react negatively. You need extra grace in your marriage, your relationships, your family and every area of your life.
My dear brothers and sisters, the journey of life is not always easy. There will be moments when your strength will fail. There will be moments when your patience will be tested. There will be moments when your faith will be challenged. But you must not give up. You need extra grace to remain faithful. You need extra grace to persevere. You need extra grace to forgive. You need extra grace to love. You need extra grace to overcome disappointment. You need extra grace to keep moving forward, even when progress seems slow.
The five wise virgins were prepared for the unexpected. They understood that the journey might take longer than anticipated. May we also develop that kind of spiritual wisdom and preparedness.
My dear brothers and sisters in Christ, remember that extra means going beyond your ordinary capacity.
It is extra strength, extra favour, extra wisdom, extra patience, extra preparation and extra grace.
Above all, it is the grace that enables you to remain faithful until the end. Our journey is towards eternity. Therefore, we must prepare ourselves spiritually and never allow the challenges or delays of this world to make us lose sight of our final destination.
I pray for you: May the extra grace of God come upon your marriage. May it come upon your businesses. May it come upon your workplace. May it come upon your family and all your endeavours.
May God give you extra strength when you are weak, extra wisdom when you are confused, extra patience when you are challenged and extra favour when you need a breakthrough. May that extra grace turn things around for your good. May you never run out of spiritual oil. And when the Bridegroom comes, may you be ready to meet Him.
May the extra grace of God carry you to the end.
Amen.
Disclaimer: The opinion expressed in this homily is strictly that of the homilist, Rev Fr Felix Ovai Ekpe, and does not represent Theluminenews, it’s agent or the organisation the author works for.